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The Student News Site of Alexandria City High School

Theogony
The Student News Site of Alexandria City High School

Theogony
Max Carpenter

Max Carpenter, Satire Editor

Max Carpenter is the satire  and opinion editor for Theogony 2025-26. He loves politics, both local and national, and is the self proclaimed “best satire editor to ever grace the front page of Theogony.”

All content by Max Carpenter
Students exploring the EVIL club fair.

Thegony’s Guide to New Clubs at ACHS

Max Carpenter, Editor
September 24, 2025
Local elected officials, pictured sitting from left to right, School Board Chair Michelle Rief, Virginia State Delegate Charniele Herring, Vice Mayor Sarah Bagley, and Mayor Alyia Gaskins, listen to a question from youth panelist Mikel (center). (Photo courtesy of Mayor Gaskins)

Report From the First Mayoral Youth Forum

Max Carpenter, Editor
April 22, 2025
Playboi Carti Drops 3-Hour Experimental Spoken-Word Album

Playboi Carti Drops 3-Hour Experimental Spoken-Word Album

Max Carpenter, Editor
March 12, 2025
SlimeGetEm takes a photo on junior Bruke Wonite's phone at a recent concert. / Image courtesy of Bruke Wonite

DMV Rappers Don’t Play: A Review of ‘GetEm’ by SlimeGetEm

Max Carpenter, Satire Editor
March 6, 2025
As students return from winter break, they will no longer be able to use their phones during the school day. That ban does not take today's digital world into account, Max Carpenter writes.

Phoning It In

Max Carpenter, Editor
January 3, 2025
Gaskins, in a jade green dress, is standing and looking up in crowded restaurant with people in the background who can be seen through a glass door.

“You can make change,” says Mayor Alyia Gaskins

Max Carpenter and Maxwell Jones-Lachance
December 2, 2024
JD Vance stares nervously outside his window as children protest. (Rozalia Finkelstein)

Angry Children Rally With Lightsabers and NERF Guns Outside of V.P. Pick JD Vance’s House

Max Carpenter and Leo Maucieri
September 11, 2024
Jacinta Greene discusses concerns with a voter.

Local Candidates Come to ACHS for PTA Meet and Greet

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
June 5, 2024
Album cover for Because the Internet. / Childish Gambino

Childish Gambino: A Discography Review

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
May 23, 2024
A photograph depicting a pin labeled “VOTE” on a ballot application

Candidate Scramble: Who Would You Vote For?

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
April 9, 2024
An illustration of a LGBTQ+ pride flag flying outside of ACHS.

Homophobia in ACPS: It’s Worse Than You Think

Max Carpenter and Rozalia Finkelstein
February 12, 2024
Henry Kissinger pictured on the phone, 1975 / National Security Archive (public domain)

Ding-Dong the Witch is Dead: Henry Kissinger Deceased at 100

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
January 31, 2024
Organizer of the event Eliana Rougle speaks and officially begins the third annual Java Jive.

Photos From the 3rd Annual Java Jive

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
December 8, 2023
One of the organizers gives an impassioned speech.

Photos: Palestine Walkout

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
November 16, 2023
The Bigger Problem Behind Noah Lyles's Bold Statement

The Bigger Problem Behind Noah Lyles’s Bold Statement

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
October 23, 2023
Mood meters are one of the devices used in SEAL lessons. Image courtesy of ACPS

Revisiting S.E.A.L. Lessons: Help or Hassle?

Max Carpenter, Staff Writer
October 23, 2023
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